Fear

Today was one of those days that make me glad we do what we do on Sundays. Logistically, it was a minor challenge. Relationally, it was absolutely why God has us on a corner in downtown Omaha.

Logistically? This weekend was the annual Summer Arts Festival in downtown Omaha. It’s a nice festival with artists from all over, music, kids’ activities, and everything else one could imagine with a festival such as this one. The only problem it presents for us is the organizers don’t seem to know or care that we set up a family meal for a few hundred every Sunday on the very corner that is the entrance to the festival. So we improvise. We have a pretty good Director on our side, so improvisation isn’t such a big deal. So the plan today was to set up on our old corner. As we were about 5 minutes away from the downtown area, we got a call from someone who helps most weeks. She informed us that there was no place to park the van and trailer on our old corner. So she asked a police officer if we could park in front of some barricades that were being used to block 14 th St. They directed us to the corner of 13 th and Douglas St. So it was a bunch of improv for us in this weekly adventure, but we knew going in that would be the case. And it didn’t take us completely by surprise. One of the funny things that happened was the concerned calls we received from our friends downtown in the days leading up to Sunday. Robin answered the phone Saturday night to one of our friends telling us all about the fact that the festival was set up on our corner and what were we going to do? Wing it. That’s what. And we did.

Relationally? Well this is where it was good for me. In a strange way. I find myself more and more lately not being able to have meaningful conversation on that corner. Just too much chaos. Good chaos, but chaos nonetheless. So today, in a really weird way, in the middle of the logistical concerns, which really turned out to be no big deal, I was able to actually spend time with a couple of fellows that I’ve really come to appreciate very much over the past couple of years. The conversations weren’t extremely long or extremely deep. Or maybe they were a bit deep. On the one hand, I had a chance to talk to a guy we’ve known from the beginning. Shows up most every Sunday. Real, honest to goodness street guy. Whatever that means. But he’s lived a rough life. And lived a pretty agnostic life, if I’m not mistaken. But it seems that God has place a certain biker church in his path. Imagine that? God working in strange and humorous ways. Because this fellow is a fellow of conviction. You can see it in his eyes and you can hear it in his words. So he’s been telling us about this biker church for a while now. Just about 10 blocks straight west of where we meet on Sundays. Tells Robin and I that we have to visit this church some Sunday. And we just might. Because logistically, they meet at a time that would allow us t do it at least one Sunday a month. So today he mentioned that he’d just finished a long conversation with Robin. And she wasn’t happy with him. Now he and I both knew that she was simply unhappy with the way he was heading. As we are with lots of our friends. We can’t change them for sure. But we can let ‘em know what we think. And occasionally we do. So he’d just finished his talk with Robin and here I was going for round 2! I think both of us had the same bottom line for him. We just don’t want to see anything totally preventable happen to him. And he knows that. His comment to me was that it was going to happen to us all someday. I agreed. And as I shook hands with him and told him goodbye, I told him that before that happens he’d better be darn sure his heart was right with the Lord. He just looked at me and said “you had to go there, didn’t you?” Yep. Had to. And did. And I pray that he goes there.

And then I had the chance to sit on a wall in the shade and have a nice long conversation with one of my buddies. We talked about his life. His behavior. His dread and hate of his lifestyle. His anger and frustration at wanting to quit and not being able to. And his fear. He told me that for the last few months, he has been carrying around this fear. That something bad was on the horizon. That if he didn’t change things drastically, he’d really be in trouble. He reads his Bible pretty regularly. He believes. I know that. But he continually turns from God. As we probably all do in some way, shape or form. I tried to get that across to him. That we are all pretty busted. But God’s grace is so huge. And Robin has told him that he’s living in God’s extended grace. He knows what he needs to do. But he just doesn’t know how to get it done. This thing has been on his back for 37 years. Over 50 arrests in 8 years. 150 different charges. Most of them minor, open container, stuff like that. But lots of time lost. Never get that back. Today he was sober and very easy to talk with. That’s not always the case, but it was today. And I just pray that a seed was planted in his head that he can do it. With Christ, he absolutely can do it. Maybe the fear will push him to the point of finally doing something to begin the long uphill climb of change. We have a saying between us. The language isn’t nice. I’ve said it once to him. And frankly I think I shocked him when I said all those months ago. I don’t even have to use the language anymore. Once was enough. And every time I see him now I remind him of the road he’s on. It’s a %$#&*^ up road. He knows it and I know it. And God knows it. But he’ll rescue us from that road. I’m convinced of it. At times I wonder if some of these hardcore guys can ever change. I mean real, long term, mind and heart change. Put down the bottle forever change. We’ve not seen much success in the time we’ve been down there in that regard. We’ve definitely seen people change. Out of the shelters. Into apartments. Short term sobriety. But I don’t think we’ve seen one of our hardcore street friends get that massive gorilla off their back. Surely it can happen. Right? We see so many people, the odds are that it has to be possible. Right? I pray that is the case. And until we see it? We’ll keep fighting the fight. On whatever corner we end up on. With whomever will put on the gloves with us and go into the ring. I pray that the fear will be enough to make a difference for my buddy.

[The Lord speaking to Paul] “I am sending you to them to open their eyes and turn them from darkness to light, and from the power of Satan to God, so that they may receive forgiveness of sins and a place among those who are sanctified by faith in me.” ~Acts 26:18

Peace, have a great and blessed week and make a difference.

…it matters to that one…

2 Boxes on Father’s Day

Many times over the past few years, I’ve gotten a call or email from someone asking about giving us a donation. A clothing donation. And lots of times, it was because someone, a family member…a father, an uncle, a brother or a son left and wouldn’t be needing his clothing anymore. I always struggle with these ones. I remember the first time it happened like it was yesterday. Walking through someone’s apartment after he’d left. Gone. Never to be heard from again. It was just strange. A fellow from Union Pacific called me and asked me if we could use his father’s clothing. All of it. His dad was gone now and wouldn’t be needing it anymore. It is with real mixed emotions that I accept these calls and I really struggle with them. I mean, the stuff needs to go somewhere and we have a pretty good avenue to use the things people give us. But the other side is a family member is gone and it just seems so personal when you are talking about the clothing. I mean, I couldn’t begin to estimate the amount of clothing we’ve been blessed to be able to help out with over this time. The people we meet with weekly just have needs and it seems to be that one of the biggest needs is simple clothing and things of that nature. But when a person leaves this great big ball of dirt and those left behind are left to figure out what to do with the stuff? Well that’s a tough one.

I went through this to a degree last year. My father left us at the age of 75. Last May. His deal here was done. I’ve written about my dad a few different times. About our relationship, or lack of one for many years. But in the end, it was very good. I miss him today. Greatly. And ironically, this past week we had visitors here in Nebraska. Several of my nephews from Alabama came to visit. Part of the draw for them was the College World Series, which has been taking place here in Omaha for the past week or so and will conclude early next week. But part of the trip was just to get together with family and do what family does. But a funny thing happened. My sister packed a couple of boxes for the fellows to bring to Omaha. A couple of boxes that just happened to have clothing. From my father. For this ministry thing we do weekly. A donation. Now this is a tough one for me. The clothing was in the trunk of the car they drove to Omaha. My father’s old car. And some of his clothing was in the trunk in 2 boxes. I found out that they brought this stuff the day before Father’s Day. Fortunately I’d already completed sorting out the stuff for today when I found out about the boxes. I don’t know how I’m going to sort and distribute his stuff. I mean I realize it’s only stuff. But it was his stuff. My dad’s stuff. And I just don’t know what it’s going to be like to look through those boxes one year later and make an attempt to sort through it. I guess I’ll do what I have to do, but man…

So on this day, this day when we honor our earthly fathers, I’d like to take a moment to honor my father. He had a few warts. Don’t we all. He had his flaws. Don’t we all. But deep down, he was a good man. And I am so thankful and blessed that before he left us, he and I worked it all out. We had a great relationship in the end and I think that’s all we can hope for. I pray for other relationships that are not so good these days. I pray they will be good again. Somehow. Someday. And until that day, I am so thankful that on this day, this day when we honor Fathers, I can honestly hope and pray that my life in some way honors our heavenly Father. The One who is responsible for it all. The One Whom I rely on for so much. I can, in no way do justice here, but I can valiantly try. And that I will. And next week? I’ll try my best to go through dad’s stuff and do with it what I know he’d tell me to do with it. I can almost hear his voice now, in his southern drawl and his way with words, and the way he always called me David. Not Dave and certainly not Super Dave or anything else. It was always David. I can hear him telling me to give it away. He’d probably say “it ain’t much, but somebody can probably use it. Go on ahead and do whatever you want with it.” Well dad, I’ll figure it out somehow. And God, can you help me figure it out? All this craziness here? All this homelessness, this neediness, this poverty, this substance abuse, this mental illness…the list goes on and on. God, can you help me figure it out? Can You help me to be the father You created me to be? So that in the end, my kids don’t have to pack my “stuff” up in boxes and try to figure out what to do with it all? 2 boxes? Man, that’s going to be a tough one.

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. ~Hebrews 12:1

Peace, have a great and blessed week and make a difference.

…it matters to that one…

Stuff and things…

We started serving from two different lines last week. It lends to obvious advantages. Time being the key. Less waiting. More time to hang out and chat. Easier to serve a warm meal. Things like that. One big disadvantage, from a purely selfish standpoint for me is my inability to meet and greet all of our friends downtown. I always work my way through the line after we pray and just say hi to everyone. It’s probably one of my favorite things to do. I get to see old friends, new friends and in between friends. It helps me to remember names also. And here’s the big one for me. It allows me keep, in my mind, a sort of mental record of who was there on a given Sunday. I have zero recall most times, so I don’t know what that really buys me. The thing is, it’s tough with so many people to know who’s there and who isn’t. I saw a guy today, as I was working my way through line number one, that hasn’t been around in at least a year or more. He left quite some time back to work in Arizona. I asked him what he was doing back in Omaha? His answer was not so unlike many these days. Unemployment. Said if he was going to be unemployed, he might just as well be unemployed here. And he was with another fellow that I hadn’t seen in a while. Probably one of the best dressed homeless guys we’ve met in our time in the downtown area. So when our friend arrived from Arizona, he asked if we were still in business. I thought that was pretty funny. Still in business? I told him as long as God was in business, I imagined we’d be in business. I don’t really know what that meant, but I know I meant it, if that makes sense. So back to the dual line system. One of the major disadvantages for me is the inability to greet everyone. I’m going to have to make my arms longer or something because I haven’t figured out how to work my way back and forth between the lines. About halfway through the first line, I gave up and decided to do one at a time. And then I saw someone waiting for me at the end of line number one.　

This fellow was released from jail recently. Ever since we’ve known him, I swear he’s been in jail more than he’s been out. Until recently. And like most of our friends, he’s a great guy. He’d literally give you the shirt off his back. So when he got out of jail this last time, he made a statement to me that I hear often. “I’m quitting Dave.” Period. So I kind of shrugged it off. I hoped he would. I know he hoped for it also. But, after seeing and hearing it many times before from many different people, I had my doubts. But a funny thing has happened. Or maybe not so funny. This guy is really on a good path. For the most part, he’s quit the crazy lifestyle that got him in so much trouble…over and over and over. He’s got his own place now. No more living on the streets. No more bridges. No more any of that stuff. For now anyway. And he really seems to be taking pride in his new lifestyle. I couldn’t be happier for him. One problem still exists for him. And it’s a big one. You could say that he’s double dipping. He’s making a valiant attempt to rid himself of the destructive lifestyle that caused him so many problems over the years. But he’s still hanging around the same people. Different behavior on his part. Same massively destructive behavior from his buddies. Our friends. And he expects them to change. It’s a tough road. To really change, he’s probably going t have to make some impossibly difficult decisions sooner rather than later. I pray he has the intestinal fortitude to hang on and do what he knows he’ll probably have to do.

Here’s a bit of irony. The corner where we meet weekly is directly across the street from the main branch of the Omaha Public Library. It literally serves as a sort of day house for lots of our friends. Before today, it opened for business at 1:00 p.m. on Sundays. So from noon to 1:00, we had a pretty captive audience. But as of today, because of budget cuts, they’ve discontinued Sunday hours. No more library for our friends on Sundays. So from a selfish standpoint, I kind of liked it. We didn’t see the rush to get there that we normally see when the library opened. But for our friends? Not much to do on a Sunday now. And you know what idle time brings. But a funny thing happened last week. And I should mention that we’ve been seeing lots more kids and families on that corner recently. For whatever reason. So last week a fellow comes to our house with a donation. This is the realtor that actually handled our house sale. Great guy. And he shows up with tons of kid’s stuff. Not KidStuf. Kid’s stuff. Stuffed animals, some toys, and lots of kid’s books. Lots and lots of kid’s books. I have to be honest. When I saw the boxes in the garage, I had a bit of a minor anxiety attack. We usually don’t take much stuff down for the kids. There just haven’t been that many kids…until recently. I pray that we don’t start seeing more. So when I saw the bags and boxes, I wondered what in the world we’d do with them. And Robin says to me, “Just take a box down and see how it goes.” Or something like that. But I couldn’t take just one box. So we took several. And as I made my way through the serving line, anytime I saw anyone with kids, I told them to make sure they got over to the trailer when we put all the other stuff out because we had some special stuff for them also. And the books were a hit. Kids sitting all over the sidewalk picking through books and taking the ones they liked. There’s something about kids that warms my heart. I absolutely love kids. I loved being involved in our KidStuf program when our family attended our church in Charlotte. Loved it. And when I saw all the kids today going through the books and walking away with armfuls? Well, let’s just say I had zero anxiety and it was a good thing. I think probably half the books found a new home today. I think we might be on to something in that regard. Just a bit ironic that the first day the library is closed on Sunday, the kids get a treat and I’m reminded of what it means to see them doing what kids do. On a downtown street corner that is pretty chaotic lots of times. What an absolute blessing to be a part of God’s work today. I’m blown away that we can be in community for few hours each week with some of the greatest people. What a deal.

If there is a poor man among your brothers in any of the towns of the land that the LORD your God is giving you, do not be hardhearted or tightfisted toward your poor brother. Rather be openhanded and freely lend him whatever he needs. ~Deuteronomy 15:7-8 (NIV)

Peace, have a great and blessed week and make a difference.

…it matters to that one…

Waiting

What a great day downtown today! We had a regular family picnic today. The great folks from St. James church came today and took it up a notch. Grills, burgers, hot dogs, potato salad. Man, it was quite the spread. It really was much like a family picnic. Friends, family, great food. All the ingredients for a great time. When I got up this morning, after listening to an all night storm, I was wondering if this might actually be the day that we get rained out. Completely. I mean, it rained and hailed all night. Hard. And at approximately 7:00 a.m. this morning, it was pouring. I knew of all the work St. James had put into getting this thing up and running today and was hoping we’d be alright. The rain let up a bit later and things seemed as if they’d be ok. They were. Mornings like this are nice for lots of reasons. All the people that normally help cook get a break. That would include my lovely wife. Things are just a little calmer in the Laney kitchen on the first Sunday of the month when St. James is doing the meal. And seeing as though the Book of James is one of my favorite books of the Bible, it’s just fitting that they step it up the way they do. And I swear today they kicked their game into a whole new gear. It is so unbelievably cool to see members of a church step out of their normal Sunday routine and get into something like this. It is most definitely a win-win for everyone involved. Our friends downtown were treated to a great meal of Omaha Steak’s burgers and dogs. Really good ones. The folks from St. James get an amazing opportunity to share, in action, their great faith. And we just have to show up with everything else. It’s just really cool to see them in action. They brought several gas grills and had them up and running with burgers and dogs coming off them so fast our friends couldn’t keep up! It was awesome. And this type of opportunity exists for anyone to get involved. I often hear people say they want to help. Today I saw it firsthand. Wow. I love serving in this community.

I’ve noticed for some time that our friends do a lot of waiting. Wait to get a bed at the shelter. Wait to get an appointment at wherever. Wait to get a computer at the library. Wait to get a meal. I mean, there’s a bit of that that’s going to happen. Goes with the territory. But one thing I’ve noticed the past few weeks is there’s a lot of waiting to eat at our regular Sunday gatherings. In some cases, I swear a guy has to wait 45 minutes to get a meal. Now I’m biased but even I don’t think the food is so good that it’s worth waiting for that long. And it’s not really like we are amateurs anymore at serving a meal. We’ve been at it long enough that we can get people through pretty quickly. But it just seems like people are waiting a lot. Too much. Last week I really noticed it. I schmoozed my way through the line and 40 minutes later, I see some of the same guys that haven’t eaten yet. Enough. This week? Two serving lines. Here’s the deal. I’ve been at the shelters and watched our friends wait for things I take for granted. If I want to go to bed? I go to bed. If some of our friends want to go to bed? At one particular shelter in town they have to wait on the back patio until they can be processed in. Like 5 at a time. Sometimes in below freezing weather. Outside, waiting for a bed. Let’s just say that dignity is not at the top of the list sometimes. So when I see our friends waiting yet again, it bothers me. Especially to get something as basic as a meal. On Sunday. So this week we split everything up and had 2 serving lines. It was so simple and I could kick myself for not doing it sooner. We may not have to do it every week. We literally got everyone through in half the time. Imagine that. They still had to wait. Just maybe not quite as long today and the wait was definitely worth it today.

One last thing. No really. This is it. But it’s a biggie. This week, one of our friends will have surgery to correct a cataract. Might sound like no big deal. And maybe to some it wouldn’t be. But to our friend it’s a big deal. And to us it’s a big deal. A really big deal. To a fellow from a foreign country who is in our country, our city, living in a shelter, seemingly spinning his wheels in so many ways? I can’t imagine what it would be like to have to deal with that. I guess I mostly take my vision for granted. It’s there. I can see what I want to see. I open my eyes each morning and I can see pretty clearly. This fellow doesn’t necessarily have that luxury. But after Tuesday, things should be a bit better for him. By the Grace of God and a few generous donations, he should be in a different state later in the week. We usually agree to disagree that the blessings come from God. I mean he knows that, but just has maybe different views on some of these things. Whenever I tell him not to thank us for anything, he disagrees and says he must. For various reasons. So we agree to disagree. But it’s a good thing. We aren’t able to see eye to eye on some things, but we both get the big picture. He was in such good spirits today. The waiting for him is finally over. I can’t wait to hear how it goes for him. He once told me he was depending on us for something that was rally important to him. If he only knew how undependable I really am, he wouldn’t be depending on me for anything. But as unworthy as I might be, I have hope in Christ. That’s all I need to know. I pray that things go well for him this week. Somehow I know they will.

Consider God’s generosity towards you rather than your own unworthiness in His sight, and live in His strength, rather than in the thoughts of your own weakness.   ~ St. Vincent de Paul

Peace, have a great and blessed week and make a difference.

…it matters to that one…

6 Beers and a Task Force

I had the chance to talk with and pray with a fellow today and it just broke my heart. He’s a fellow that we’ve known since almost the beginning of this thing we do downtown each week. When I first saw him today, it was obvious he’d been drinking. Now it was noon when I first saw him. Seriously? Drinking before noon on Sunday? Told me he had 6 beers this morning. Well, yeah. It’s how it works for lots of these guys. If I back up a bit, I really have felt the need lately to be a bit more intentional about lots of things. Especially as it relates to things on that corner and just brushing off some of the things I see each week. Laughing and joking about a guy drinking before noon is not something I want to have happen. Sometimes it’s easier to just laugh it off rather than confront it, even gently. Or any other way. So today when I saw our friend, I just took it a step further and asked him to at least not drink before noon. What a ridiculous request. From his perspective anyway. But it was a request. For next week anyway. At least. I have no idea how hard that will be for him. Or if it is even possible for him. We had an opportunity to pray briefly. Just me and him by the side of the van with traffic buzzing by us. I wonder sometimes what people think when they drive by and see this crazy thing happening each Sunday. And today was most probably the biggest crowd I’ve seen on that corner. Just seems to grow weekly. I pray that somehow we can sustain it. That God would send us cooks. Because if today was any indication, we’ll need all the help we can get. So after we finished our prayer by the side of the van we both looked up and in his eyes were tears. Hurt. We just see it so much. A guy wants to quit and get away from it, but the alcohol has it’s hook in. Deeply. Wickedly. I see so much hurt and so much despair caused almost exclusively by choices. Of alcohol. Of substance abuse of varying kinds. It all seems so avoidable. Seems like such an easy choice. But it isn’t. That’s for sure. I saw it in his eyes. Through the tears. “That stupid alcohol”. His words. He told me he wouldn’t drink before noon next Sunday. I guess we’ll see.

I have to mention a couple here today that have been so instrumental in this thing lately. Amazing family. It’s so cool to see how God works in a ministry like this. After almost three years, we’ve seen lots of people come and go. It’s a big commitment. We know that for sure. People jump in with both feet and go at it for a while. Then the burn out thing kicks in or they just get tired. Like I said it’s a big commitment. For sure. But when people or families jump in and take ownership, it just makes me smile and thank God for his unbelievable faithfulness. All he asks is that we go. He’ll supply everything we need to keep it going. We just have to be willing to go. And today this couple went above and beyond. If I’m being honest, God will smile on them for sure. But it’s what we’re called to do. To help those who need it the most. To love and care for those who maybe might not see it otherwise. I don’t know. I just know this family shined today. Not unlike most Sundays. I saw my own wife working her tail off this morning to make a quality meal for our friends. And they pulled it off. Beef and chicken enchiladas, corn, rice. Man it was a good looking meal. And lots of it. And the people that commit to making it happen week after week are a blessing to so many. I know we served at least 250 meals today. We ran out of forks, spoons, everything. Had to make a run for more. Unbelievable. Yet God continues to fill in the gaps. With great people. And His unbelievable Grace and Love. Amazing.

And then there was the task force. We have an ongoing situation down there involving a young fellow who is an alleged sex offender. Now I have to admit, I’ve searched various websites looking for confirmation and have found nothing. He once told me the story of what actually happened. Now I only got his side of the story. But something definitely happened. And everyone down there knows. And everyone is an authority. And each week it seems like someone wants to take me aside and “break the news” to me. As if it doesn’t happen every week. I think people just want to be safe, but a part of it is surely that people want to be the one to break the news. Whatever. Look, I bring my own kids down there, so I try my best to know who we are dealing with. But there just isn’t any way. It’s a wide open corner. Anyone can come and anyone can go. If evil insists on joining us on that corner, I just pray that God’s presence will be enough to offset the ridiculous evil that lives in this crazy world. So one of the fellows has organized a task force. I chuckle when I think of it, because he literally has a handful of people “stationed” at various points looking out for this fellow. The task force! And today he gave me the lowdown on what his guys are looking for. They are attempting to establish hard evidence against this fellow. Man, if I only had the energy. Anyway, it’s just another angle into this thing. We now have a task force. Personally, I think we’re covered by the real Task Force anyway, so I don’t worry too much. And it’s so funny, because if the people that took me aside each week would just stop and think about how ugly we all are before God in so many of our actions and words, it might just cause some people to stop and think. Maybe not…

Anyway, just a few things on my mind this week. It was an interesting week for sure. A cleansing week. Lots of interesting conversations today on that corner. I felt a bit of renewal for some reason. Just feels good to be on that corner, in God’s presence. What a bizarre community we’ve landed in. In such a good way. I can’t believe we’d have it any other way. I love it. It’s a little much to manage anymore, but that’s ok. Like I said, we just have to show up and watch the Lord work. What a cool thing to be able to say. What an even cooler thing to be able to do.

And this world is fading away…But anyone who does what pleases God will live forever. ~ 1 John 2:17, NLT

Peace, have a great and blessed week and make a difference.

…it matters to that one…

A Memorial Day Mind Dump

Monday. Memorial Day. So many things bouncing around in my feeble mind. Used to be that I would journal my thoughts on Monday morning on a pretty regular basis. But then Monday morning would roll around and I’d have already forgotten anything of significance that happened on the previous day. Amazing what a little age can do to the mind! So I started doing this thing on Sundays, almost immediately after coming home from downtown. I got a little lazy yesterday and decided to see what might come up in my recall abilities if I threw this together this morning. We had a busy few days leading up to Sunday. Our host student is leaving us soon. Back home to Germany. I pray that her time here has been good. She’s been here since January and leaves the first Friday in June. We spent the day at an amusement park on Thursday, went to Lincoln to tour the university and state capitol on Friday and did some yard work on Saturday. So we had a little downtime yesterday after coming in from downtown and we all took advantage of it. No half marathons this week. Just a little downtime after downtown.

It was a pretty nice day downtown yesterday. Nothing unusual happened. Not from my perspective anyway. Pretty calm crowd. A couple of crazies, but that’s pretty normal. Numbers seemingly growing each week. We were visited by a home group from a church in our community. I believe they are looking for an opportunity to serve in some manner in the community and they heard about what we do downtown and came along for the ride. I always wonder what people think when they come down for the first time. This group of four came to our house and then headed downtown with us and jumped right in. Helping with the setup, serving, all the things that go along with this ministry. It’ll be and always is interesting to hear their thoughts. At one point, I was getting a to-go plate for a friend. The serving size on the plate was pretty heaping. Nice portion. So as I was making my way through the back of the serving line, one of the people from the group asked me if the serving sizes weren’t a bit too big. Now I usually try to keep my nose out of that arena. Usually, whoever is doing the serving has a pretty good handle on what we have. But this person was down for the first time. And she mentioned to me that the line was pretty long and they were sure giving out lots of food! Would we have enough? And I had to look at the amount and agree with her on both counts. The line was long and they were definitely giving out large portions. But I was pretty sure we had plenty. And I was able to tell her. It was just slightly humorous to see the concern. Because I learned long ago that if we go, God will definitely take care of the rest. Loaves and fishes, I always tell myself. Loaves and fishes. And when I mentioned that to her, she smiled and agreed. I think.

Definitely keeping it short this week. I’m reminded this week of our veterans. Those that made it back and those that didn’t. Lots of homeless veterans. I served a couple of years in our fine military. I think it goes without saying that when we serve, we feel a sense of camaraderie. No doubt. No matter how much time separates me from my time in the service, I feel it. And I’m obviously reminded of the sacrifice that our troops make for us. Lives lost. The ultimate sacrifice. Families separated. Difficult times for sure. And of course I’m reminded of THE ultimate sacrifice. That God would send His one and only Son to die for us while we were still sinners. Man. Talk about the Ultimate Sacrifice.

Look! I stand at the door and knock. If you hear my voice and open the door, I will come in, and we will share a meal together as friends. ~ Revelation 3:20, NLT

Peace, have a great and blessed week and make a difference.

…it matters to that one…

Southern Winds

Lots of really, really good things come out of the south. Lots. Excellent food. Excellent people. Really good, down home people that would give you the shirt off their back in lots of cases. Just lots of goodness. There’s a particular church that I’m especially fond of that just happens to reside in the south. Great, great church that is doing amazing things for the kingdom. Starts with the pastor (or reverend as my kids like to call him), his family and absolutely trickles down to the folks that call that church home. I spent the first 12 years of my life in the south. Spent 5 of probably the most important years of my life fairly recently down south. Florida. North Carolina. Great times and great memories. Probably love to go back someday. But today? We’re here and full in. Yesterday was unseasonably cool here. Winds straight out of the north. Cold winds. Had to sit through an early morning soccer game. Just crazy cold winds for this time of year. But not today. Today the winds were out of the south and they couldn’t have been nicer. I mean, it was a little cool, but not nearly as bad as yesterday. So where am I going with this? And what is the significance of the weather report? Well it is very significant. At least it was to me. Especially from about 9:50 CST this morning until approximately 11:30 or so. I was inspired not long ago to run a half marathon. The inspiration just happens to have been the above mentioned reverend. So wind speed is pretty important when considering the day and time to run. For me anyway. Nothing worse than running headlong into a cold north wind on a run. Headlong into any wind for that matter. But the cold north wind? Forget it man. Not happening. So since I was inspired by a great friend from Charlotte to do this thing, I had to just buckle down and make it happen. Today.

I’d been semi-planning for some time now. Trying to get my road legs built up. I run on a treadmill often. Most everyday. But running on a treadmill is not the way to train for a half marathon. Conditioning is fine, but the old legs take a beating on the roads, so it’s a different ballgame. So this was going to be the day. I was a bit worried yesterday with the winds. But the forecast today was for partly cloudy and winds at 10-15 mph out of the south. Since the majority of my run was in a northerly direction, things seemed to be set up pretty nicely. So I could bore people with even more details of the actual run, but I won’t. I will say that it was pretty interesting in many ways. Very metaphorical at times. Struggling to get up some of the steeper hills (yes we do have hills in Nebraska…not many, but they seem to be longer and steeper on a long run). Coasting down the other side. Long straight-aways. All things that resemble so many of life’s challenges and pitfalls, as well as the victories. Had lots of cranking music bouncing around the old noggin and did lots of praying. As much as you can in between gasping breaths!

So I planned on getting downtown just before Robin and the other folks who were coming to help. But the winds pushed me in a half hour early. Nice tailwind! I couldn’t believe it. The guys downtown thought I was crazy. They might be on to something. I very well could be. But it’s something I wanted to do. A bucket list sort of thing maybe. Lots of jokes about how they make medications for runners. They have things called cars with wheels that would have gotten me downtown much quicker and with much less exertion. Stuff like that. All good natured. It was funny, because my adrenaline was sky high when I arrived. And I was a full half hour early. So it gave me time to just chat with people in a much more relaxed environment. No set up. No making sure everybody was taken care of. Just a relaxed time for hanging out. And when I got there at 11:30, there was already a huge crowd lining up. Just an amazing opportunity to hang out and share a little with whoever. And I got so many chances to be so intentional about faith things today. It was so cool. I have to admit, by the time we were loading up the trailer, I was fading fast. But it was so worth it. And last week when I was doing a partial training run, an idea popped into my head. A marathon to benefit our friends. Or in my case, a half marathon. The Half for the Homeless. Or something like that. A run that could traverse 2 counties, involve lots of people and raise lots of awareness. And our friends could be the recipients of whatever came of it. I have high hopes that it could be a real blessing. As long as He wants it to happen. As I ran this morning, I had lots of thoughts around this idea. I pray it was God’s idea and He just pushed it off on me. Obviously, if it’s in the Plan, it’ll happen. I pray it’s in the Plan.

So in all of it, I’m reminded of one of my favorite verses.

Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. ~1 Corinthians 9:24

Now obviously, “all the runners” this morning consisted of me. So I did in fact get the prize. And I did in fact have those great winds out of the south at my back. But the runners in this thing we do each week are all running with great abandon. So many people from so many backrounds. And I’m so blessed to be a small part of it. I simply want to cross the real finish line in such a way as to earn the real prize. Not matter if I’m bloodied and bruised along the way. In fact, I hope that does happen. Because my hope is that I never just go through the motions. That as I meet each week with our friends that there is a genuine desire to be there. A genuine desire for change. A genuine desire for southern winds at my back and an eye on the prize.

Peace, have a great and blessed week and make a difference.

…it matters to that one…

Mother’s Day…

Today is Mother’s Day. Now some may call this a Hallmark holiday. I’ve been guilty of it on occasion. But it really is a day to honor the Mothers in our lives. What an amazing sacrifice they make. Not to get too personal here, but in my case, there are a couple of ladies who’ve gone above and beyond the call of duty. Robin and my Mom, Gerdo. I’ve been blessed so far beyond anything I deserve in this life. God has pulled me from the grip so many times. And each time a certain someone is standing there, waiting to pick up the pieces. Mom did it more times than I could count. Now one could say that’s part of the job description. But in my case, especially with my Mom, well, she was far underpaid if that was part of the job description! I literally owe her my life. Ironically enough, a random reading in my morning devotional this morning was centered on the prodigal son. Luke 15:11-32. Mom, like Someone else, is always there. Arms open. Waiting for us to return. What an amazing testimony. And of course, I’ve been blessed with an amazing woman to do this whole life thing with. Robin is one of the most amazing people I know. I’m biased, of course, but it’s true. She’ll hate that I’m writing this, but isn’t it always easier to ask for forgiveness? To navigate through our life the way she has, with the pitfalls and craziness that I’ve put her through? Amazing. Homeschooling. Ministry work. Compassion. Amazing. Between her and Mom, I don’t know how one guy could be so blessed. I wonder how many of our friends downtown today got the opportunity to spend a little time with Mom today? If I had to guess, I’d say not so many…

Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her:  “Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.”  ~ Proverbs 31:28-29

Ironically enough, on this day that we celebrate Moms all over, I’m also reminded that one year ago today my Father left us. Again, not to get too personal here, but it’s been a strange week for me. My Dad and I had grown much closer over the years. We didn’t have much of a relationship for a very long time. Wasted lots of years. Lots. But in the end, there wasn’t much we could do about the wasted time. And I’d like to think we made up for it. At least partially. I know that like most people, we have a few situations in our life now that need attention. I pray that God will guide us and direct us in how exactly to deal with some of those situations. I know in His time, He will. I just know that I’m so thankful for the time my Dad and I did share before his passing. We were able to spend a few weekends together. We attended an Auburn football game together. What an amazing weekend. I drove over from our home in Charlotte. We spent an entire day walking around the Auburn campus. Reminiscing. Enjoyed a bit of our mutual favorite pastime. College football. But it was then I realized how much older and how sick my Dad really was. It literally took him a week to recover from that trip. I had no idea it would be that tough on him. But he loved every minute of it. As did I. So on this day, this day that we celebrate the women in our lives, I have to carve out a little bit if time to remember my Dad. It wasn’t a let’s go to a ballgame/fishing/hunting kind of relationship growing up, but in the end, we made it work and I’m so thankful that we did that before he left us. I think lots of times, at least I know in my case, all I really ever wanted from Dad was to hear that he was proud of the man I’d become. I have so much to learn. I’ve made and continue to make so many mistakes. But before he left, he told me on several occasions that he was indeed proud. If only I could hear those words from him again. If only I could hear them from Him also. I wonder how many of our friends downtown long to hear those words? Probably lots of ‘em.

Gonna keep this a bit short today. Or maybe not. Downtown was a bit of a rush, but I do want to share one thing that happened. Our foreign exchange student participated in the high school graduation ceremony, so our time downtown was short. Others picked up the slack. But in the short time that I was there, I met a fellow. His name isn’t as important as was the question he asked me. He simply asked if Christ would continue to forgive a fellow who was caught up in an addiction that has haunted him all his life. Would Christ forgive a fellow believer who couldn’t quite beat his demons? He said he could stay sober for 6 or 7 months at a time, but then he’d fall and need help up again. Now for me, I struggle sometimes when guys ask me questions like this. I have no idea why. Maybe because sometimes I just don’t know. In this case? I know. He does. Every time. That has to be the answer, right? I mean, I didn’t read that little bit of wisdom this morning for no reason. He’s always there with open arms each time we turn back to Him. I tried so hard to let this fellow know that. So I had an opportunity to pray with him right then and there. I love doing that. I used to be a bit uncomfortable praying with people in public. I don’t know why. But it comes easier each time I do it. And today it was real.

We are so thankful that God has blessed His ministry work on that corner in such a way. He is so amazing! I’m so thankful that He placed this craziness in our laps. I’m so thankful that I can pray for more help and it comes! What an amazing testimony to His faithfulness. Thanks God for all you do and for your unbelievable Love. Thanks for Moms everywhere that shape lives and do so the way You’d have it happen. Thanks.

Happy Mother’s Day! (Mom and Robin!)

Peace, have a great and blessed week and make a difference.

…it matters to that one…

Dichotomies

So today was an extremely strange day. I began my morning listening to a podcast from our church in Charlotte called REJESUS. A fascinating look at the Wild Messiah. So today I just listened to the introductory podcast. I downloaded the remainder of those that are available. I highly recommend this podcast series (ucfellowship.org).  I’m sure it’s an amazing group of messages that will challenge anyone listening to really look into themselves and see what it really is they believe and maybe even why. So that was my morning in the garage getting ready to go to see our friends downtown. My Sunday mornings are getting a bit lighter. That’s one of the nice things about spring/summer. The needs, the physical ones at least are a bit lighter. No heavy winter coats. No gloves. Sneakers replace winter boots. It just seems the trailer is lighter. The other side of that is the amount of people in need. I swear today was one of the bigger crowds we’ve seen in a while. One way I can judge the number, because I’m not too good at looking at a crowd and guessing, is the number of handshakes and hugs. I always try to make my way through the line and greet our friends as best I can. The line today stretched almost an entire city block. I’m guessing at some point I’ll be shaking hands and getting hugs in the crosswalk! Or at least around the other side of the block. So the winter needs have lightened, only to be replaced by the sheer amount of people in need. I don’t know if that makes sense or not, but I’m sure there’s a point here somewhere. 

Which leads me to my next thought. This weekend in Omaha, the Oracle of Omaha himself, Warren Buffet, held his annual shareholders gathering. A mere 4 or 5 blocks from where we meet with some of the neediest people in Omaha, some of the wealthiest people in the world were cheerleading and carrying on about their good fortune. Approximately 35,000 people attend this thing annually. I suppose in some circles, they might have been voicing concerns about the fact that a single share of Berkshire Hathaway stock is “only” worth about $93000.00. That’s down considerably from it’s September 2008 high of $147000.00. PER SHARE!!! That’s just freaky. So a few blocks from our corner, some of the wealthiest people in the world were probably lamenting their misfortune. Unbeknownst to them, there were a few hundred people on a downtown street corner who were trying to figure out which bridge they might be sleeping under tonight. And asking us for tents. And sleeping bags. And these requests weren’t for some vacation camping adventure. What irony. What an unbelievable dichotomy. What a shame. I’m not for one minute saying that throwing money at homelessness would solve the problem. Not at all. It’s much deeper than that for sure. But it was just odd to me as we left the downtown area today, as I looked at the Qwest Center, where the meetings were taking place, that there was such a divide between the two factions.

 Today, the great folks at St. James were back with enough lasagna to choke a herd of horses. I mean, the line was long. I sometimes wonder if we’ll have enough. Not to be a doubter. I just wonder. And every time I looked at the stack of pans near the table, I wondered. And of course, we had just enough. Just like always We always have enough. I had an interesting conversation with a fellow about that situation. You see, Robin and I usually never eat downtown. I would feel pretty badly if I had a plate of food and someone showed up who hadn’t eaten. I would feel really badly actually. I can go home and grab a bite to eat. There folks have to figure out where the next meal is coming from. I once heard a guy say that if a fellow got hungry in this town, he wasn’t trying very hard. I understand that. But I struggle with taking something and then not having enough. His point was that we should at least have a small bite to eat with our friends. I know he’s right. I just have a hard time with it. One of his arguments was that we should show everyone that the food is good enough for us also. I know that much. The food is always excellent. Robin wouldn’t have it any other way. It has to be the best. So us not eating may send the wrong message in various ways. I just feel we’re there to serve. Him. And in the process, lots of folks get blessed in lots of ways. Not the least of which is us. I mean, we must have passed out 300 bottles of water today. That’s probably more than we’ve ever handed out. In fact I know it is. And we had lemonade and coffee on top of that. Just a massive amount of people showed up today. And not a penny from Warren Buffet. All from God. No doubt.

And the weather was absolutely stunning today. Barely a breeze and about 70 degrees. Chamber of Commerce weather for sure. Almost had a little dustup. And yours truly was right in the middle of it. It’s funny how alcohol adds strength to a fellow who otherwise might not be so bold. Today, in both individual cases, these fellows weren’t feeling much pain. And in reality, neither one of them probably could have landed a square punch. But I certainly didn’t want to find out. In the end, I know that eventually something will shake out. We’d never had rain until last week. So far, we’ve never had a fight. Someday, a scuffle will break out. With the number of people we see each week and the outside “influences”, I’m not naïve enough to think it won’t happen. I hope and pray it doesn’t. I don’t want to see it. I was almost in the middle of it today. Would have seen it up close and personal. But cooler heads prevailed. Or something.

 So another great day in downtown Omaha. It seems odd saying that a few hundred people in need constitutes a great day. It doesn’t. But when God provides for some of the needs of these folks, well that does indeed meet the criteria for me. I had one girl tell me that if we didn’t show up each week, she didn’t know what she’d do. Not sure what that means really, and I guess I don’t need to know. I do know that God continues to blow me away. Each and every week. He just sets such a great scene for us down there to show people what He can do if they only allow Him to use them in meaningful ways. It’s just amazing.

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. ~Jeremiah 29:11

Peace, have a great and blessed week and make a difference.

…it matters to that one…

Gone…

Tough week. Started with a funeral on Monday. An infant funeral. I’m pretty sue that was a first for me. I hope it’s a last. I don’t think I’ve seen anything more heartbreaking and gut wrenching than a father carrying his infant daughter’s casket. And he was pretty strong about it. I know for a fact I would have been a basket case. We met this family sometime previous to the Christmas of 2007. I know this because we’ve been blessed to help them the past two Christmases. They have 3 other young children. When we met them, they were homeless. Now? They have an apartment and they are struggling, but doing better. But this was definitely a bit of a setback. That seems so trivial to say the death of an infant daughter was a setback. I don’t know what else to call it. It was so difficult for me. I can’t imagine what it was like for them. Baby Pearl was born prematurely and was just not strong enough to make it on her own. There were complications. The parents had to make the extremely difficult decision of removing the life support. I don’t know how you make that decision. I just don’t know. She was a beautiful little girl. She is a beautiful little girl. She’s with our Father now. That much I know. But it was probably the most difficult parting service I’ve ever witnessed. At least for someone that wasn’t a part of my immediate family. This family though, has been through so much. And now this? Some things just don’t make sense to me.

And then when I got home from work Monday afternoon, we received a letter stating that a friend whom we’d been trying to help with a cataract surgery had been denied an opportunity to receive a free surgery to remove or repair his cataracts. Whatever it is they do. The thing is, they reviewed 60 or so candidates. Of those, they chose 23. We were convinced he’d be one of the 23. And so, I get home from work that day, see the letter and the hope I experience as I open the letter is overwhelming. You see, throughout this whole process, he has proclaimed to Robin and I that he is counting on us. Flaw number one. Never count on your fellow man. I mean hope that things will come out the way you’d like, but never count on it or we might be setting ourselves up for disappointment, right? I tried to explain that to him many times. So when I open the letter and find out that he has been rejected, I of course was pretty bummed. We wanted so badly for him to get this done. Well, as God would have it, He gave us a backup plan. Actually, it was probably His main plan. A family who has helped in many ways, was deciding what to do with a particular amount of money. It was the young son who had this fellow on his mind and heart. And as God would have it, this young boy really wanted to help in this situation. Now he didn’t even know that this fellow was rejected by the eye clinic. He just wanted to help. So they asked if they could help in this particular situation. Are you kidding me? Seriously? Yeah. Absolutely. So stay tuned for this one…more to come here for sure.

Sadly, we lost another friend this past week. This is the local news blurb:

“A man’s body found along the Missouri River in downtown Omaha Tuesday morning has been identified as 55-year-old Robert Naeve.

A tugboat operator noticed the body on the Nebraska side of the river south of Riverfront Drive and Dodge Street shortly after 11 a.m. The area is home to a number of transients.

The cause of death is still pending results of the autopsy. Investigators do not think it’s suspicious.”

Now here’s the thing. I didn’t know this fellow very well. I saw him almost weekly. I know that he spent the entire winter living on the river. And survived that only to leave us just as spring is breaking. I’d like to be able to give funny analogies and stories about Bob, but like I said, I just didn’t know him that well. I tried several times to get to know him a little better, but he was just a more reserved kind of fellow and didn’t talk much. About the only thing I really remember from any of our recent encounters was helping him with a pair of boots this past winter. He was so thankful and appreciated the fact that he could get a new pair of boots without having to do anything in return. No strings. No forms to fill out. No conditions. Just a simple transaction, but to him it must have meant something because he thanked me several times over the next few weeks. And then we received word on Tuesday that a body had been found down by the river. And over the next few days, we learned who it was. It is so saddening and disheartening to hear of these things. Very, very difficult. I find myself scouring the papers and Google to see if there is any word about these types of things. And I usually find very little. These guys are just on the outer edges of our daily lives and yet when they leave us, it is with little or no fanfare. Just a 2 or 3 sentence blurb in the local paper, a mention about the fact that his last known address was probably a shelter or a place where the homeless or transients hang out and then they pretty much disappear from our view. I pray that somehow, someway Bob knew the Lord. In THAT way. I just can’t imagine our friends being so marginalized that not only are they somewhat separated from society, so to speak, but they are also separated from God. That is heartbreaking. I pray that somewhere along the way, Bob accepted Christ in his life. That the light of Christ shined on him and he is now in his eternal resting place.

And finally…our streak is over. Today the forecast was for a 65% chance of rain at noon. It rained off and on all night and pretty much all morning. It rained all the way downtown today. But you know a funny thing happened. We arrived downtown and I halfway expected a small crowd due to the nasty weather we were experiencing. But that was not the case at all. It was probably one of the larger crowds we’ve had so far this year. As we unloaded the trailer, the rain was spitting. Peopel were hustling to get things set up before the rains came. I asked a friend to pray that the rain would stop. he looked at me funny. I said I meant it and right now! He again looked at me funny. I again told him I meant it! Right now! And finally he complied. And it wasn’t like we didn’t pray all morning for the rain to stop. And all the way downtown! So as we got everything set up, the rain started coming down a bit harder. It never poured. That’s the upside. It did rain. That was the downside. In 2.5 years, it had never rained on us downtown. Today that streak ended. I guess it’s time to start the next streak. So while it did rain, we did not get rained out. That has never happened. I pray that it never will. And today we had a huge crowd in spite of the weather. And an amazing meal. A local girl scout troop provided the entire meal. Homemade Salisbury steak, corn, mashed potatoes and gravy. What an amazing day. What an amazing ministry. What an amazing God we serve! Even in the rain!

The light shines in the darkness, but the darkness has not understood it. ~John 1:5

Peace, have a great and blessed week and make a difference.

For he will deliver the needy who cry out, the afflicted who have no one to help. ~Psalm 72:12

…it matters to that one…